Skeptic's Annotated Bible
3:1 Now Moses kept the flock of Jethro his father in law,
Hang on, we just learned in Ex 2:18-21 that Moses is married to Zipporah, the daughter of Reuel (i.e., his father-in-law is Reuel). Who is this Jethro?
the priest of Midian: and he led the flock to the backside of the desert, and came to the mountain of God, even to Horeb.
3:2 And the angel of the LORD appeared unto him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush: and he looked, and, behold, the bush burned with fire, and the bush was not consumed.
Good thing they didn't have fire extinguishers back then. I doubt the bush would be as impressive when doused with compressed CO2.
3:3 And Moses said, I will now turn aside, and see this great sight, why the bush is not burnt.
3:4 And when the LORD saw that he turned aside to see, God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said, Moses, Moses. And he said, Here am I.
Freaky.
3:5 And he said, Draw not nigh hither: put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground.
And forevermore, the devout restrained from wearing shoes on holy ground. This is why people take their shoes off when going into a church. Wait, they don't? Huh. Take some confusing story about Onan and conclude that this refers to masturbation when it clearly doesn't, and make people for thousands of years feel ashamed and guilty for doing something completely natural; but a clear instruction like "put off thy shoes from off they feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground" gets completely ignored. What a strange religion.
3:6 Moreover he said, I am the God of thy father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob. And Moses hid his face; for he was afraid to look upon God.
The only way of interpreting the fact that Moses hid his face to avoid looking upon God, is that if he didn't hide his face, he'd be looking upon God. I mention this because there are several places coming up when it's claimed that nobody can see God, which is clearly inconsistent with what we've read so far. God appeared in bodily form over and over (e.g. Gen 18, when he visited Abraham to discuss fatherhood and the destruction of Sodom).
3:7 And the LORD said, I have surely seen the affliction of my people which are in Egypt, and have heard their cry by reason of their taskmasters; for I know their sorrows;
It's about time you noticed. You let this happen, by the way. An interesting contradiction here too; either people have free will and God leaves them alone to control their own destinies (as he did before the flood, or for the descendents of Joseph in Egypt up until now); or he fiddles with people's destinies to bring about specific ends (like when he made Joseph's brothers kidnap him and sell him into slavery, or like what he's about to do now). Those who argue that people have free will would have to concede that this is not absolute; otherwise the stories in the Bible cannot make sense.
[As an aside, for those who believe in the "power of prayer" to influence God to do nice things for them, this is also conceding the point on free will.]
3:8 And I am come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians, and to bring them up out of that land unto a good land and a large, unto a land flowing with milk and honey;
Ah, a land of milk and honey! Vegans need not apply.
unto the place of the Canaanites, and the Hittites, and the Amorites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites.
Such an unhealthy focus on categorizing people into different groups; this is foreshadowing of prejudice.
3:9 Now therefore, behold, the cry of the children of Israel is come unto me: and I have also seen the oppression wherewith the Egyptians oppress them.
3:10 Come now therefore, and I will send thee unto Pharaoh, that thou mayest bring forth my people the children of Israel out of Egypt.
3:11 And Moses said unto God, Who am I, that I should go unto Pharaoh, and that I should bring forth the children of Israel out of Egypt?
A reasonable question. Also: "If you're God, why do you need me to do this for you?"
3:12 And he said, Certainly I will be with thee; and this shall be a token unto thee, that I have sent thee: When thou hast brought forth the people out of Egypt, ye shall serve God upon this mountain.
Not much of a freakin' token, now is it? A token that he can use to prove that he's being sent by God on a holy quest? I would think it would be some sort of amulet, or a special ability, or something visible. All he gets is God's promise that, at some point in the future, Moses will be a servant again on this mountain?
3:13 And Moses said unto God, Behold, when I come unto the children of Israel, and shall say unto them, The God of your fathers hath sent me unto you; and they shall say to me, What is his name? what shall I say unto them?
3:14 And God said unto Moses, I AM THAT I AM:
God is Descartes?
and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, I AM
My name is "I AM THAT I AM," but you can call me "I AM" for short.
hath sent me unto you.
3:15 And God said moreover unto Moses, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, the LORD God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob, hath sent me unto you: this is my name for ever, and this is my memorial unto all generations.
3:16 Go, and gather the elders of Israel together, and say unto them, The LORD God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, of Isaac, and of Jacob, appeared unto me, saying, I have surely visited you, and seen that which is done to you in Egypt:
Yeah, that'll convince 'em.
3:17 And I have said, I will bring you up out of the affliction of Egypt unto the land of the Canaanites, and the Hittites, and the Amorites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, unto a land flowing with milk and honey.
3:18 And they shall hearken to thy voice:
"...for I shall have taken from them their free will..."
and thou shalt come, thou and the elders of Israel, unto the king of Egypt, and ye shall say unto him, The LORD God of the Hebrews hath met with us: and now let us go, we beseech thee, three days' journey into the wilderness, that we may sacrifice to the LORD our God.
Yes, right, don't forget the sacrifice or the deal is off. It's been a while since anyone has killed anything for me, and I miss it.
3:19 And I am sure that the king of Egypt will not let you go, no, not by a mighty hand.
3:20 And I will stretch out my hand, and smite Egypt with all my wonders which I will do in the midst thereof: and after that he will let you go.
Okay, wait a minute. God knows that Pharaoh will refuse to allow Moses and the Hebrews to leave Egypt. God is omnipotent and can do anything (remember Gen 18:14: "Is any thing too hard for the LORD?"). He can make a 90-year-old woman pregnant, and he can cause Joseph's brothers to kidnap him and sell him into slavery, and he can cause the elders of Israel to harken unto Moses' voice (we just read that in Ex 3:18, not TWO verses ago), but he can't make Pharaoh just agree to let the Hebrews go? Instead, he foreshadows that he will have to smite Egypt with all his wonders in order to convince the Pharaoh?
What kind of a cruel, twisted mind would choose all that suffering over influencing the decision of one person, especially when influencing the decisions of people is one of the things that God does most? This is such a wretched book, ugh.
3:21 And I will give this people favor in the sight of the Egyptians: and it shall come to pass, that, when ye go, ye shall not go empty.
Oh, well, yes, let's revisit the old scam that Abraham used to play with Sarah: if we're going to cause suffering for some other people, we should at least get rich in the process, right?
3:22 But every woman shall borrow of her neighbor, and of her that sojourneth in her house, jewels of silver, and jewels of gold, and raiment: and ye shall put them upon your sons, and upon your daughters; and ye shall spoil the Egyptians.
Nice. When Simeon and Levi spoiled Shechem (yes, I'm still not letting that go), the reason they weren't punished was that God actually liked it.
It can't be that God doesn't like slavery and the suffering of humans (remember, he told Hagar to return to slavery under Abraham and Sarah, even though she was pregnant and being beaten by Sarah). Slavery is one of the common themes in Genesis. This is about which humans (the Hebrews) are being enslaved and made to suffer. In other words, this is a recipe for racism. A truly moral book would teach that ALL PEOPLE have the right to not be enslaved and not to be made to suffer.
You know, if someone read this and actually believed it literally, I imagine they could convince themselves that spoiling the cities of a people that they believed God didn't like would be a good thing. Now that I think about it, this could actually be very dangerous. It's a good thing that people don't take this kind of thing literally, and act in accordance with this book's teachings. That'd really be horrible.
Oh wait, they do. *sigh*
It's amazing to read this and see the seeds of such horrible suffering, cruelty, racism and atrocities right here in such plain sight.
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